This is a list of the little irks.
Admittedly, and sadly, there are a lot of big problems in the world.
You will not find them here.
This is a list of the little irks. The things that make your face crumple in on itself in equal parts exasperation and irritation. The mildly annoying stuff that crops up in life like proverbial flies in the ointment, bringing you haltingly back down to earth just when you’re walking on air.
To be blunt, it’s annoying shit.
As a person of limited patience, quick to frustrate and, if I’m honest, more British and orderly than I’d like to admit, I encounter mildly annoying things most days. To the point where I’ve started to ask myself: is it me? Am I the problem? After writing this, perhaps I’ll find out.
This list is not, nor will it ever be, if I’m any judge, exhaustive. Humanity is nothing if not productive, and discovering new ways to be annoying is unlikely to be the exception. I’ll add to it as and when these things occur, and perhaps take stock at regular intervals.
You may recognise a few of these...
In no particular order...
Tuesday 10th February 2026
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Sunday opening hours - technically open, completely unavailable when I need stuff.
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Waiting an hour for pub food - especially when no one warned you.
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DIY after 9pm - there's no project that requires a drill at that hour.
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Thursday bin collection - makes an absolute racket at about 6am, week in, week out.
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My right sock slipping down inside my shoe - after a solid hour or two of behaving perfectly well.
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Sudocrem face prints - on pillows, on sleeves, on unsuspecting shoulders.
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Aimless wanderers - usually in doorways, supermarket aisles, or directly in front of you.
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Jake fastening things too tightly - bread bags, jars, my water bottle. A diet hack, apparently.
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Meat film packaging - excessive and never opens as intended, ever.
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Pensioners shopping at weekends - seriously, you have all week?!
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Teams messages that just say "Hey." - just tell me what you need!
Sunday 1st March 2026
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People parking on paths - this is not a work around for double yellow lines.
